


Are You Hurting The One You Love?

by TeenageCriminalMastermind



Series: Ceremonials [1]
Category: Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi - Fandom, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angst, F/M, Reylo - Freeform, florence + the machine & star wars angst is never good for anyone, just disappointment and angst, just sad af tlj stuff, that throne room scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2017-12-17
Packaged: 2019-02-16 04:57:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13046952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeenageCriminalMastermind/pseuds/TeenageCriminalMastermind
Summary: Kylo Ren tried to kill Rey, but failed. Ben Solo is currently killing her.





	Are You Hurting The One You Love?

_Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_You say you've found Heaven, but you can't find God_  
_Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_Bite your tongue until it tastes like blood_

Her eyes say yes.

She’s more disappointed than angry, more hurt than enraged. In that now-destroyed throne room, all of her screams that he hurt her. He hurt her when he asked her to join him. He hurt her when he asked her to rule with him. He hurt her when Kylo Ren reared his ugly head and put its menacing claws in a vice-like grip over Ben Solo.

He cannot live without her now, but he cannot be what she wants him to. And that hurts him far more than it hurts her.

 

 _Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_So many glasses on the tabletop_  
_Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_You'd like to stay in heaven but the rules are too tough._

For a moment, he’s convinced.

When she pleads against his actions, for that one moment he is ready to change his mind. To drop it all and leave this godforsaken ship for the Resistance. But they would never taken him back the way she has - there will be jeering and pushing, punches and broken noses, boycotts and isolationist tactics. He will be their object of hatred, a punching bag they can funnel all their hate and rage into.

And he does not intend to take any of that.

 

 _Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_When they watched the walls, and the ticking clock_  
_Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_And was it something you could not stop?_

Rey waits for him to say something different.

She is waiting, waiting to see if he drops his anger and agrees with her. But that does not happen, so she calls for that lightsaber, and he does too, and they are locked in a power struggle again. _Oh, Ben, was this all for naught?_

 

 _Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_When you leave them sleeping on the hollow ground_  
_Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_And lost for themselves_

It breaks in two.

His grandfather’s lightsaber breaks in two, a part knocking him out. Rey falls back from the impact too, but comes to her senses earlier, because Ben Solo is knocked out cold on the ground. She knows the Resistance needs her, but so does he. If she leaves him alone here, she risks committing the very act of abandonment she so loathes herself.

With tears in her eyes, she bends down to kiss that scar and tries to steel herself as she turns her back on him.

That small “Rey” that escapes him doesn’t help matters.

 

 _Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_And if heaven knows, then who will stop_  
_Are you hurting the one you love?_  
_You said you got to heaven, but it wasn't enough_

He’s there.

As the remainder of the Resistance piles on the Falcon to leave Crait, she feels his presence through the bond. She reminds him of his past, the part that should not be killed, and puts the image of the die from the Falcon in his palm.

Ben’s head lifts up and she can feel those eyes boring into her, the regret and shame clear in those brown irises. He can feel her disappointment, her regret. She hates that she just wasn’t enough for him, that her words and actions weren’t proof enough that he had a chance.

But she isn’t his mechanic or his panacea, and Rey hopes that the Force is enough to convey what her words failed at _ **.**_


End file.
